Who?


  Who am I writing this blog for anyway? I have a new app called Fabulous, and it's supposed to help me stay on track. I said I would write in my journal, and this is the closest thing I have at the moment. I did not go out and buy one more book to write in. I already have about 30 of them, after burning a dozen of them. I am writing this blog for my family who want to know what it's like to be me. Who want to know what I'm up to, and why.
  We left sunny Samara on 30th, almost 2 weeks ago. We drove to Liberia, spent the night by the airport, and flew into Las Vegas on the 31st. It was wonderful to spend time with my son Seth and his lovely wife Marika. There was not a lot of jet lag, but I felt a bit dazed being back in the United States of America. On the 2nd of September my daughter Melissa picked us up for the drive back to Cedar City. It was so nice to see her, to see my car, to zoom on down the road towards the town that I left behind a year ago.
  What a whirlwind week. Always someone to see, and some business to take care of. I was able to see Jaden and Reece and Kiara with her Andrew. It was great to see Dre and Kenya again. It was like deja vu all over again. Everything was the same, except my place in it. I walked into our old apartment which was taken over by adult children, and it was familiar, but so different. I went to lunch with 2 friends, and their lives seemed the same. Yet I felt like I couldn't relate, having been to all those amazing foreign places that changed how I saw life.
  I was tired after the week was up. I was ready for a quiet ride to more family in Apple Valley, California. And it was so wonderful all over again. Familiar sights, family smiles. I was relaxed and happy. Then Ron gets a call about his new job, and I have to make new plans for the next 6 months. I though it was all set, and I knew exactly how it would go. Now it's September 11th and we still don't know when the job starts. Unless they change their mind again, we will have to make new plans for where to be and what to do at Christmas time.
  I was in a bit of limbo, but it was one that I understood. Now it's a different state of limbo and I have to figure it out. What if this job doesn't start for another month? I'm not upset, I'm barely frustrated. I just really liked feeling like I knew what was next. I had grand visions of the holidays in Seattle. The job could be 2 months starting next week. It could be 3 months starting the 3rd week of October. I was getting used to the idea of a life where I could make plans. But I made a choice a long time ago. I am not defined by what happens to me. I am defined by how I choose to handle it. By how I choose to be as kind and thankful as possible. I define myself by my ability to embrace and convert my troubles. Starting with my perspective.
   So bring it on. Whatever will be, will be. At least I have my app to remind me to stay Fabulous, and carve out some kind of daily routine in this gypsy life I started. Life is a dance, and I'm willing to learn a new twist. My time with old friends and family has been so precious. I will keep on keepin' on.
  I'm a writer. That was the big accomplishment this last year. To actually proclaim that I am a writer. So I could build the suspense of this unknown with the move to Seattle, but I'm anti-drama. People on the east coast, they had some real drama. I don't want to stress over this move. I refuse to. I'm saving all of my stress for my book. So tomorrow morning I will write. Becoming a part of a writing community and making friends with other writers has been wonderful. If you ever wanted to be something, then I suggest this. Join a travel group or whatever will help you feel closer to your dream.
 

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