Those odd moments

  It has been odd since last night. I wonder what is going on, anyway? My husband crashed at 8:30pm last night. That never happens. The man doesn't believe in going to bed early, naps, or sleeping in. I wish my body clock was like that. I finally went to bed around midnight, and I was in that half and half stage of sleep. Sleep in the time for the body to heal, and the subconscious to take the wheel of the mind. Or the brain, I guess. It's kind of odd really, losing consciousness, and your mind still going while your body shuts down.
  I have been looking closely at that relationship between the awake and asleep parts of the journey. Today it seems like the motor is always running, when it comes to the mind. So I thought of how I could relate that my brain is always trying to get "home". " Home" is my Mom's current house that she built, in Samara in Costa Rica. It's on a dirt road in the jungle. So I'm thinking that during the day my synapses are making these connections and having these conversations, and doing all these activities. Using up fuel to go rushing down the freeway of life, driving my car down an actual freeway, getting the laundry done, cutting up pomegranate for my husband and I. All of these things we do every day. Going at eighty miles an hour with eight lanes and other vehicles zooming by. Sunlight streaming in through the windows, as I stay alert and stay safe.
  Then I go to sleep and it's like being on that narrow dirt road with pot holes. It's a different kind of driving and for eight months it's mud and muck, and clouds of dust the other four. Is this analogy working?
  Ok, so last night I was hinging between worlds, my favorite place to be. It's when my mind wanders without distraction, my ability to see things is closed but my brain is still pulling up images from my mind's eye. I got lost a little last night, it was odd. We have traveled so much this last year, you know? I had to do a checklist. Where was I? Tukwila, near Seattle. What day was it? Tuesday, November 7th. Did I have an alarm set? No. Did I have something tomorrow that I absolutely needed to do? Nothing pressing. Ok then. This is an important checklist, but strange that I wasn't sure, so I had to review. This is week three in Washington. Only five weeks to go, and then I'll be in a different bed at night. But with the same man. For the record. Not that anyone is asking. But that's my favorite point of reference.
  Then in the morning my car decides to not start. It won't turn over. What's the point of getting a "good" car if it isn't reliable?? It's a 2016 Elantra for crying out loud. Poor Ron was late for work once the tow truck guy charged the battery. But whatever, in the grand scheme of things I can't complain.
  My brain understands these things. Yet when I go to eat lunch and the microwave stops working, that annoys me to no end. Do I have to be so human? I was looking forward to nachos, and there was all this shredded cheese that wasn't melting. The disappointment was thick. I didn't have the patience to put it in the oven. I just ate it, with all that cheese dotting the salsa. Not the same. Not at all. What is going on around here? Some days are like that though, right? Not a "bad" day, just the kind of day when you are eating nachos without the warm oozing cheese to delight you. No, it's still "nachos" but it's really not nachos at all.
  A smart person would have stuck it in the fridge and made a peanut butter sandwich or something. Or, a less stubborn one. My brain was in nacho mode, and the salsa was out on the counter. And I don't know why I chose the option to keep going with those flecks of orange goodness not melting. I tried, but I couldn't make the microwave bend to my will. I couldn't melt the cheese with my frustration. But I could carry on. So I did. I don't even know what the moral of my story is today. "Carry on!". I suppose... "Don't blame the microwave", that's a good motto in life. I guess.
  (I am writing this blog today for a particular friend of mine who likes the little details of my American life).

What I wanted, versus what I got. I found these pictures to represent my hopes that were dashed at lunch today.